Some notes for lawyers from a juror

Ok, so last December I had the joyous opportunity to be selected for jury duty. It was a civil case, so we the jurors never had to worry about putting anyone away, but over the course of the trial we did realize that we could be doling out some hefty damages. While I could get into the details of the case, suffice to say that it was a two week long slog through the intricacies of commercial window installation, and why it's really, really hard to renovate old semi-dilapidated buildings. However, a few notes fow lawyers on some annoying things we as jurors mentioned while deliberating:

1. We can tell when you are acting. Perry Mason was a fun show, and it might have given you the desire to go into law in the first place. However, you are not an actor - you are a lawyer. All the fake indignation, all the fake surprises, all the raised tones of voice had the overall effect of making us take you less seriously.
2. Do not coach your witnesses. We had a good laugh in the jury room when we all recalled how the lead lawyer for the plaintiff, on multiple occasions, picked his head up, scowled, and vigorously shook his head "no" to his lead witness who was being cross-examined by the defense. Lawyers, you're less than thirty feet from us. Do you really think you're that sly that we won't notice? Even if the other side doesn't object, you make yourself look really, really bad.
3. Do not hang your case on a logical absurdity. To sum up a mildly complicated case, the plaintiff claimed that the contract was not complete because of some defects. Now, the extent and number of defects was contested, but the plaintiff's logic was that any defect at any point in time in the future was a sign of improper installation, and hence the contract had not been completed. At some point a warranty has to go into effect. The plaintiff in this case wanted us to believe that the work had to last effectively for eternity for the contract to be fulfilled. Needless to say, we eventually decided (after being initially split) for the defense.

All in all it was a good introduction to the civil court system. However, I have to question the wisdom of plaintiff and defense when hiring lawyers who make the above mistakes. For $200 an hour you should expect more than this.